Saturday, September 7, 2013

Learning to Say No

Hi Friends,

When I moved back to NY after college, I volunteered for everything!  I chartered and was President of my sorority's alumnae chapter, I was VP of my high school alumni association, I was a mentor to a HS student, and also volunteered on that mentoring org's Young Executive Board.  It was A LOT! By the time I began graduate school, I was beginning to show signs of wear and tear, almost resenting the very things I volunteered to be part of.  

After about a year of juggling my full time job, full time grad school, and all the afore mentioned activities, I was done!  I had to pull back.  At first it was difficult.  I was overwhelmed with guilt, and felt left out as  the groups I once worked with moved on without me.  But after those feelings subsided I actually felt something I wasn't used to...

Relief.

The pressure these commitments placed on me wasn't something I identified with until it no longer existed.  Thoughts of what people would think of me if I didn't show up at a meeting or complete the task I was assigned kept me up at night previously.  I didn't want to let anyone down, and that can be a strong motivator.

As I count down the days to turning 30, I've realized that saying no is a powerful tool of self-preservation.  By picking and choosing how I use my time, I can "say when" and give only as much as I'm willing to.  No longer do I find myself sucked in and resentful to my volunteer commitments.  The few that I have now and the levels at which I support are more manageable.  Even though I've since completed grad school and have more time, I still keep myself limited to a few extras, to make sure I don't overextend myself like I used to.  

Growing up as an overachiever, it hasn't been easy to say no. But like they say in surviving a plane crash, you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first before helping others.  You have to be the best you possible if you are going to be of any use or help to anyone.  Knowing when to say no has been that oxygen mask for me, and with it I breathe in...

Exhale out...

And say No!  :)

-mel b.

Saturday, August 31, 2013

My love/hate relationship with Castor Oil

Hi Friends!

This is my first #ConfessionsOfA30YearOld post-- Yay!! :)

As a kid I dreaded the "wash out" my grandmother forced me and my sis to do once a year.  We each had to drink a triple shot of castor oil straight with fresh squeezed orange juice as the chaser! 

#TeamGrossAsFawk! 

Hence why I have an aversion to juice with pulp now, and don't mess with oranges in general lol but I will say I wasn't as sick as a kid due in part to that yearly dreaded ritual. 

But my hair?!? Freakin' LOVES her some Castor oil! no problem using it now.. for hair though, never drinking that ish again! Lol 

-mel b.

Friday, August 30, 2013

Reflections & Confessions

Hi Friends!

So much for that August blogging challenge! lol  Sorry y'all, but work has been a beast!  August came and went so fast I had barely any time to enjoy this last month of the summer!  I'm excited that my work is keeping me busy, but unfortunately writing as well as other forms of creative release for me have to take a backseat to that.  Hey, these bills aren't going to pay themselves girl!

Anyway, I'm roughly 2 weeks away from my 30th Birthday!!!!  I'm really excited about this milestone in my life.  Not because it's like I did anything that amazing, I mean I was able to get through 365 days without offing myself, or someone offing me, let's throw a parade! lol

But seriously, it's important to me because as I look back on my 20s, I have to say, I'm came, I saw, and I conquered some great things, so for that I'm grateful.  I also experienced some lows along that journey, but as me and 30 begin to get acquainted, I can honestly say that all of it.. the highs AND lows, have helped me appreciate where I am today.

And where am I?  For me, my idea of success comes from three main areas:

Disclaimer: Let me stress MY, everyone's path to personal success is different, this is just for Mel B... chart your own path :)

1. Education
2. Career
3. Love

In education, I've been able to complete both college and graduate school with honors and currently hold a B.S. in Sports/Entertainment/Event Management, and a Masters in Public Administration (nonprofit concentration).  Though expensive lol, academic achievement was always stressed to me from an early age, so accomplishing the completion of these degrees meant and continues to mean a lot to me, especially that graduate degree, as it has opened the doors to advancement in my career.  Speaking of which...

In career, I made several strides.  I decided about a year out of college to pursue fundraising and since 2007, have been working to build my career in that field from the ground up.  Now in my 3rd fundraising position (4th job since college graduation), I have gone from being someone's "step and fetch it" to being the one delegating those "step and fetch it" tasks.  I've even been able to use my talents to assist in other interests of mine, namely volunteer and event management for natural hair events.  I'm hoping to do more of that in the future, but right now I'm focusing mainly on advancing in my new role.

In love, well.. I'm in love! lol I'll sound like most single women by saying that I set a goal for myself to be in a committed relationship by the time I was 30.  And there were times that that didn't seem like it would happen!  If you used to read my previous blog, or are a close friend of mine, you know I went THROUGH IT with my ex, as well as all those 'laugh at it now, but not that damn funny when it happened' wack ass dates I went on! lol  So to say that I'm happy to be in something that is way better than all of THAT mess is an understatement.  Don't get me wrong, my relationship isn't perfect, no one's ever is.  But what I was reminded of recently is that open communication can help resolve most issues, once you and your partner know it's coming from a place of love and respect.  

My birthday always makes me super reflective and this year is no different.  But as I was listening to my favorite podcast "The Read", they said something that made me laugh and think.  Crissle made mention that for many of us watching the MTV VMA awards, lost in the sauce because we didn't know who were half of the people being nominated for awards lol, it was a sign that we were getting older and no longer part of MTV's target demographic.  I laughed at first, but it's kind of true, because I can rattle off the names of 'N SYNC with the quickness and sing about 10 of their songs with no assistance from AZ Lyrics lol but ask me about One Direction... I don't know one song, and would pass any one of those boys on the street without a second glance! lol  

To that end, I wanted to start posting some of my thoughts and reflections on things I've learned in the past 30 years.  They won't be daily, (won't make that promise again lol), but they will be fairly often.  I plan to post them on my Instagram account, but will repost them here on Hear Her Tell It, on my Tumblr, and Twitter as well.  So stay tuned for what I will call #ConfessionsOfA30YearOld!

-mel b.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Today's MacGyver Moment

Hi Friends,

If you follow me on IG, you saw that I decided to participate in the #31WriteNow Blog challenge.  For this challenge, I've committed to post something to my blog every day for the month of August! 

At first I thought this concept was crazy.. I mean even at the most inspired I was only posting maybe 3 times in a week! Lol  However, I think that this challenge will inspire me to broaden what I write about as I seek daily topics to share my thoughts on.  I started to write a different post on the train this morning, but after the afternoon that I had, I plan to shelf that one for later this month!

If you live, work, or go to school in the downtown Brooklyn area, you may know that there is a summer concert series taking place on Thursdays in the Metro Tech Center grounds.  Since I started working in this area a month ago, I have caught three concerts so far during my lunch break.  Today, Sheila E. was performing.  My coworker and I walked down to catch a few songs.  It’s raining today in NYC so an outdoor concert probably is the last place you think anyone would spend their lunch break, but a couple hundred people braved the elements to enjoy the musicianship of Ms. E. 

And she gave us all life at 12:30 in the afternoon!

I tried to get a picture of her but my phone’s camera couldn’t quite capture her as well as my eyesight unfortunately.  Sheila however, is not what this post is about. 

This damn rain that took my twist out to a fro out IS what I came to speak about lol

What I neglected to mention was that I foolishly forgot my umbrella at home.  The security guard at my office was kind enough to lend me his, but I had to ditch my coworker at the concert to run to a nearby store to buy an umbrella of my own.  Once I got the umbrella, I decided I might as well find something quick to eat for lunch before I walked back to the office.  

Of course there was a Wendy’s in my line of sight and by the time I went in, stood on a long line, got my food, and trekked back up the 6-7 blocks to my office, my hair had had enough!

Upon seeing my reflection in the office’s lobby door, I was annoyed but not surprised lol.  The humidity this summer has been a constant challenge for me.  Although I was natural last summer, my hair wasn’t this long.  I was only 5-7 months into my journey at that time.  Today has been one of many times that my defined twist out lost its definition due to the weather.

Anyway, I came back in my office and without any of my tools or products handy, decided to retwist my hair in the hopes of regaining some shape to my hair.  Unfortunately, without enough time to set, the definition didn’t last that long lol.  So I decided to do what I guess many naturals do on a bad hair day.

THE PUFF!

Awww yes the puff!  Our dear friend that only needs a headband and a brush to achieve.  That go-to style that, in a pinch, can still have us looking at minimum presentable, if not as fly as if we planned on doing the style to begin with!  The only thing was that I didn’t have a headband on me.   I decided to use the next best thing… the sash of my blouse!   

And it worked out alright if I do say so!

 

So what have I learned from this afternoon?

  1. Sheila E. is everything. 
  2. This rain ain't shit. 
  3. I need to bring a few go-to hair items and leave them here in my office..i.e. a headband, hair pins, a brush, maybe even a scarf lol.  
  4. My natural hair has helped me become more resourceful 
  5. My natural hair continues to show me its versatility

So my fellow curlies, and even my relaxed amigas, I think the moral of this story is not to attend a lunch time outdoor concert in the rain lol, but if you do and your hair style goes left, it’s not the end of the world.

Look at that, day one of this challenge and I already have one post down and another post half-finished! Go me!

-mel b.

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Where You Been Girl ??

Hi Friends!

Long ass time no see right?!?  My post's title is pretty much how I would address a friend I haven't seen in a while, so I figure you would say the same thing to me in regards to my writing lol.  Well you know me by now, I get sucked in by life and next thing I know, writing ends up taking the backseat.  Though my creative aspirations have to be put to the side during these times, I’m always thinking of what I should be writing about next.  I hope to get a schedule of writing instituted again so that I can balance this hobby with the rest of my life!

So to update you on all things Mel B. I will take the Virgo approach and do it in an orderly fashion :)

Hair
I’m happy to report that since my overly-dramatic minor freak out over my last haircut in the spring, my hair has experienced significant growth!  The section of hair that was heat damaged has grown out finally and has resumed its former curl pattern.  As for the shape of my hair, that's still under construction.  The back is still shorter than the front, but in an odd way.  My plan is to get it shaped up in September for my birthday.  Unlike last year, I won’t be making any impulsive decisions about my hair lol.  I plan to go in with a plan, pictures of styles I’m aspiring to achieve, etc.  I also don’t plan on flat ironing it. 
After my last experience, I think I’m good on straightening my hair for some time.  I know that in order to do a proper trim, most stylists will give you a blowout first, but that’s about all the straightening I’ll go for at this point.  I just don’t know what to do with straight hair when it’s short.  Even when I had relaxed hair, I had a little length, so using the average barrel curling iron to add some curls was easy.  Now that my hair is shorter, the irons I have won’t do.  I also think after my heat damage experience last year, I’ve acquired an irrational fear of heat on my hair! lol  So the less heat the better as far as I’m concerned. 
I’ve decided to try the Mirror Salon at the Carol’s Daughter flagship store in Harlem.  After two of my fave bloggers/vloggers posted reviews, I was impressed enough to give it a try.  This hair thing is an ever-evolving journey, and the lessons learned from year one of it have helped me be more confident and more informed about my hair care.

Living with the boo
I probably should have started with this topic but my hair is kind of my life lol.  My boyfriend and I have been living together for about 4 months.  Time surely does fly!  Needless to say our cohabitation is still a work in progress, but we’re getting there.  Luckily we love each other enough to work through issues as they arise.  And these issues are mostly the garden variety when two independent people decide to live together… two people who have lived on their own for some time and are used to things being a certain way and not having to explain that ‘way’… two people who are now forced to compromise because those ‘ways’ may not work for the other party lol… you know what I mean! 
What I’ve come to appreciate is that we have different approaches to things like cleaning, cooking, bill paying, A/C usage, etc.  One approach is not necessarily better than the other, they’re just different.  The key to maintaining peace for me has been to pick and choose what is worth advocating for.  Now I stop and think “Is this really worth the argument/discussion that will be triggered?” , “Do I really want to go there tonight?”.  Most times my response is no, it’s really not worth it, and if the two varying approaches get us to the desired outcome, what’s the difference?  My systematic approach to cleaning versus his “toss everything around until it all gets organized” approach may seem like comparing apples to oranges, but if the room gets cleaned, that’s what matters right?  Lol 
My critical and organized side of my brain may not like it, but our collective happiness means more to me than my need to be right all the time.  Loving and living with my boyfriend is making me a better person every day.  It’s teaching me things about relationships that are new for me.  It’s been challenging at times but it’s been worth it.  It has made me love him and who we are together that much more.
And besides, making up after a ‘discussion’ is the best part ;)

Career moves
If you follow me on IG (@melbspeaks) you know that I am happily getting settled in at my new job!  The search for a new position was not as painful this year as it was in 2011.  I also attribute my life being a hot ass mess in 2011 to that pain, but that’s another issue lol.  When your house isn’t in order you can’t get anything done right, and if you do, it won’t be easy.  This proved to be true for me after searching for a position for nearly 8 months that year before something worked out.  Between issues with my living situation, family drama, and ex-boyfriend shenanigans, I don't think God thought I was ready to take on more responsibility.  That whole, "He won't give you more than you can bear" thing was exactly right for me.  I had to get some of those things figured out first before approaching a new role.  And although everything wasn't exactly perfect, 2011 ended with my resignation from my job at that time, and preparing for my new job after the holidays. 
Unfortunately, as 2012 came to an end, the job that seemed to be a lifesaver back in 2011 became more and more of a burden to bear.  My work had some highlights, mainly the agency I was responsible for raising money for, but the foundation that employed me wasn't all it was cracked up to be.  I wasn’t happy there, and the direction they were moving in didn’t sit well with me either.  I knew around May of 2013, it was time to dust off the resume and get back out there. 
Thankfully the role I am now in came along, and applying for it was the best move I could have made.  I felt that I was great in the interview, but I think my writing sample sealed the deal… You know when they told me to send in a writing sample summarizing what we covered in the interview I was like yaaassss hunntyy!  Y’all asked that right person to do that! 
And she DID that! Lol
I might be conservative about many things, but I get a little cocky about the writing.  I love it, and it loves me.  So if you ask me to do it, Imma deewww it lol! 
So to wrap it up, it’s been about a month since I started and I’m excited about the future.  There’s growth potential here, which is not common in my world. Many nonprofit professionals will tell you that in order to get promoted, you end up having to leave because that next step either doesn’t exist at the organization, or it is currently taken by someone who isn’t budging.  This isn’t always the case clearly, but it isn’t too far from the truth.  However, my position as well as fundraising in general will only grow here at this organization, so I’m excited about helping to make that happen, not just for my career, but for the organization as well!

Vacation
I had a fabulous time in Miami last month!  My boyfriend and I headed to Miami and enjoyed the South Beach strip.  We even attended Game 7 of the Eastern Conference NBA Finals!  The trip was part of his birthday present from me, and he had a great time. I would elaborate, but I posted several pics, vines, and Facebook updates about the trip so I feel like that would be overkill lol... Needless to say we had a great trip, experienced no delays in travel, and I got to see one of my bffs while there!

Turning 30
I am eagerly counting down the days until I turn 30!  It’s funny to think about, but I remember when I was younger how awe-filled I was by the fact that in the year 2000 I’d be turning 17 lol.  To think that now I am knocking on 30?!? Well more awe has definitely set in, especially taking into account all that occurred post-college… the loves, the losses, the hair changes, the crazy dates, and all the ebbs and flows of growing up!  Some days definitely were better than others, but it all helped me become the person I am today.  For that, I’m grateful. 
I have come through quite a bit in my life, and I’m proud of who I have become, and who I will continue to evolve into being in the future… a wife, a mother,  a better friend, a highly skilled and experienced fundraising professional…  The best is yet to come, and I am enthusiastic about it all!  Many of my fellow 80s babies seemed to dread thirty, but for me I embrace it, I can’t wait for it, and look forward to everything that will follow!

So I think that’s all I have to report at this time lol.  I plan to write more I promise!  In the meantime in between time, follow me on Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, Keek and Vine (search for MelBSpeaks) for rants, raves, selfies, and the rest! 

-mel b.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

He May Have Been a Stan...

Hi Friends!


So I was on the train yesterday, and this older guy was wearing his Beats by Dre headphones around his neck, and had his music turned ALL THE WAY UP! Antics like these really grind my gears y'all, especially when I'm commuting to/from work.  I mean, you have headphones, good ones at that, use them for their intended purpose please?!?

It sounded like he was listening to a mixtape or something, my music was on in MY ear buds lol, so I couldn't quite make out what was being sung.  I lowered my music, and was prepared to throw all kinds of shade his way in my head. Then I heard...

♪ Mission one, Imma put this on
♪ When he see me in the dress Imma get me some, hey
♪ Mission two, gotta make that call ♪ 

♪Tell him get the bottles poppin’ when they play my song, hey...


Yaaassss! Queen Bey was on! 

And so my shade was curtailed.  

Six more Beyonce songs followed. Could it be that this obnoxious man and I were BOTH stans for Bey? Does "Irreplaceable" make him wish he could tell off his ex in song too?  Does "Crazy In Love" make his booty bounce uncontrollably when the "Uh oh, Uh oh, Uh oh" part comes on too?  Is he DYING for new music like the rest of us Beyonce fans?

Well before I could ponder this further, my stop came and I followed the herd of people off the train.   Beysus was still singing as I departed, this time she was letting me have it with "Diva".  

This moment on the train reminded me that we can't always judge a book by its cover, or in this case, obnoxious behavior lol.  I've been on public transportation several times with someone who decides that headphones are for suckers and that everyone must listen to THEIR favorite tunes.  My favorite moment was when a guy was holding his Boost Mobile phone and kept playing short clips of music.  When the set list of DMX, Souljah Boy, and LL Cool J kept repeating I realized he was not playing songs but 30 second ringtones!! Had the phone up to his ear and was rapping along to the hook and errrthing!

#WhereDeyDoDatAt???

So this older gentleman on the train with me yesterday was shaping up to win his place in my personal "Hall of Iron Horse Transit Shameful Behavior" until I heard what he was listening to lol.  Clearly had it been anyone else coming through those headphones, I would have been hating from the sidelines lol.

But it was Bey... I'm JUST sayin'  

:)

-mel b.

P.S. If you're like me and Ticketmaster was bullshittin' when you tried to get Mrs. Carter tickets, you're probably dying a little inside every time someone says they can't wait to see her when she gets to their town lol.  Well, lucky for us, people are posting footage from the tour, and I'm sure the Beyonce camp will have a concert DVD for the masses at some point.  Here's the current YouTube video of a new song "Grown Woman". I hope it gives you life as it has given me.



Wednesday, April 17, 2013

It's Not Easy Being Green... Or Natural

Hi Friends,

Lately, my natural hair journey has had me feeling some kind of way...

Well, not some kind of way, frustrated is more like it. Why you ask?  When you look at all the natural hair bloggers, vloggers, twitterings, and instagrams, all you see are big chop pics of women with short hair, some even bald, and right next to it you see a pic of their hair a year or more later as a long, full head of curls, coils, kinks, and pure fabulousness.  These pics are meant to inspire, but recently they've had an opposite affect on me.

But let me back track a bit...

I big chopped on January 6th, 2012.  Her hair looked like this:
My first day back to work as a 'naturalista'.. They weren't ready lol



By August of 2012, it had grown  to this:

August 2012, right before my lumpectomy

August was a rough month.  On the same day I failed my road test to get my driver's license, I received word that the lump in my breast had grown since it was last examined.  I made the decision to have the lump removed, as I later learned that I had a history of breast cancer in my family.

(sb: ladies AND gents, make sure to have these kind of medical history discussions with your parents, I went most of my adult life NOT knowing that my mother had a breast cancer scare in her teens.  It wasn't until I called her freaking out about my test results that she mentioned it.  Why didn't we ever have that convo? I still don't know).

I think having all of this happen so close to my birthday made me realize that the time for trying new things is now, not later.  Whatever was holding me back in the past from being edgier or funkier with my look no longer seemed to make sense.  It was that attitude, (along with a hangover from the night before of pre-celebrating my birthday), that  led me to the impulsive decision of getting a tapered cut at the salon.  Had I thought it all the way through, I probably would have let my stylist create a faux-hawk look rather than go all the way with a cut. Now don't get me wrong, I was serving fierceness for the kids that weekend with the new cut and flat iron, but by the following week when it was time to return to my curl, I definitely felt like I went back to square one in terms of length.  See below:

My 29th Birthday- she killed ;) - 9/2012
Back to curly with a little new growth, 10/2012

Even with this shorter cut, I wasn't too phased about it, and felt like I was just going to continue to grow my hair out.  I then made a bad decision.  In another impulsive move, this time prompted by the Jay-Z Concert series at Barclays lol, I decided late on a Saturday afternoon before the concert to go to my former stylist to get my hair flat ironed.  My usual stylist doesn't really take walk-ins so I figured my oldie-but goodie in my neighborhood would be ok.  For the concert I looked cute but a few days later I realized that she had caused heat damage to a section of my hair!  I was mortified when I got out of the shower after washing my hair and saw a section of hair at the front of my head hanging down, looking as straight as wet relaxed hair, while the rest had gone back to curly shrinkage city.  I was so upset I called in sick to work.  My poor boyfriend just put his arms around me as he saw that nothing he said stopped me from crying.  Once the emotional part of it passed, I was back to my Virgo self and began looking at practical solutions to the problem.  I bought a wig, became a head wrap goddess, and finally got a weave.  See below:

Head wrap realness
If you don't like then put a wig on it!
Weaves Up, Fro's braided down!


 Ok so all the drama had FINALLY passed right?  Or so I thought!  I weathered that storm, and finally started seeing some growth again.  I was trimming the damaged hair off along the way, and the tapered cut had grown out considerably, check out the comparison:

The pic explains it all!

So last weekend I thought it was time for a trim.  Somehow though, the trim ended up more like a cut, and now I feel like I'm back at square one once again.  If you follow me on Instagram, you are probably used to me doing selfies almost everyday lol, yep 'I be feelin' myself' lol.  But this past week? not so much lol. But why have I been feeling so devastated?  

Well back to where this post started, I usually glean inspiration from photos online of my fellow naturalistas.  But with this roller coaster of a journey, I have felt like I'm somehow inadequate because my hair length is not the expected length for someone who has been natural as long as I have been.  Whenever I go to natural hair events, I get asked how long I've been natural.  When I say almost 15 months, they kind of re-examine my hair with a look of "where yo' hair at gurl?".  Then I have to explain that I got a tapered cut in September of 2012, that I'm growing it out, etc, etc.  Having that conversation before my 'trim' this past weekend never bothered me, but now?? I even decided not to go to a natural hair event in Brooklyn yesterday because of these feelings of inadequacy... even had to hype myself up this morning as I got ready for work..

It wasn't until I began walking to the train today and caught a reflection of myself in a car window that I had an epiphany.  My natural hair journey is just that-- MINE.  I'd like to think that my experience was unique, but I'm sure that other naturals have experienced similar frustrations and challenges with hair growth.  Even with that being said, my frustrations got in the way of me appreciating the fact that even with every snip a scissors has done to my hair, the singe of the flat iron that damaged my hair, my hair has made a comeback.  Patience is a virtue, and it becomes even more so as you embark on a natural hair journey.  I feel like I can hear Kermit D. Frog's "Bein' Green" playing in the background as I type lol.

 

It really isn't easy to be natural.  Making the decision to cut off the hair you've grown, and grown to love for years isn't easy.  Learning a whole new way to care for your hair isn't easy, neither is dealing with questions from people that run the gamut of inquisitive to misguided, to straight up disrespectful!  It's not easy to follow all the vloggers and bloggers, and to make sense of the onslaught of conflicting information out there in the atmosphere.  Most of all, it's not easy to shed your insecurities and old ideas of what is beautiful to embrace this new version of you.

I realized this morning that my journey, though bumpy, has made me appreciate my hair that much more.  At first, I didn't really embrace my fro.  I always had to pin up the side(s), throw in an accessory, I had to do something to it.  It wasn't until late last summer that I began just wearing it out without any extra accoutrement. So for me to see that fro go from big to small again deflated me a bit for the past few days. 

I was on the fence about getting a chai this morning, but I decided to go for it, and went into the Connecticut Muffin near my office to get one.  In line ahead of me was a fellow natural, and I immediately began crushing on her full french roll/twist updo.  I could tell her hair was thick and long in order to achieve that style.  I shrunk inside just a little bit, my insecurities getting to me once again.  

As we both waited for our orders, she tapped me and said, "I hope you don't mind me asking but what do you use on your hair, it looks great."  I told her that I use Shea Moisture and Karen's Body Beautiful.  She said she hadn't heard of KBB before so I told her about the website and also where it's available in Brooklyn.  Then she asked me what I do to set my hair and I told her I do two strand twist outs and use a pic to fluff it out when I take them down.  She seemed impressed.  She complimented me again and I thanked her again.  I feel like perhaps God was trying to tell me something.. that we all have something to offer, we all have something that others admire, even when we don't see it.  I didn't ask this woman her name, but I hope somehow some way that she knows how much her small compliment meant to me.  

Seeing my reflection in that car window this morning helped me bounce back. This woman in CT Muffin also helped.

So if you were sick of my selfies before, get well soon lol  <<Insert Kanye Shrug here>> because I am back to my usual loving me self, and as for my fro, she'll be back soon too :)  


The call me Mel-o yellow... Today at work!


-mel b.